Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Is "Stupid" a Good Defense?

When will we start arresting people for "stupid"?  It should be against the law!

Teaching Nunchuku at the University of Wyoming - maybe we should have been teaching the art of French-Fry-do
Today, it was on the news that a man was arrested for throwing french fries (considered a deadly weapon in Massachusetts) at his step-daughter during a dispute at a MacDonald's in Lowell, Massachusetts. The man was carried away in handcuffs and crime seen investigators collected evidence for a later trial - although it is reported that a few of the weapons may have been misplaced and couldn't be found. 

One has to wonder what is wrong with Barney Fife (or is this the general demeanor of the Lowell Police Department?) who arrested this individual - what sort of IQ is required of officers in Lowell? Of course, Massachusetts is a place already known for this kind of logic (or lack of it): for example, it is only one of four states in which the nunchaku is illegal.

Imagine that? Nunchaku being illegal?  That's about as smart as outlawing french fries. Out-lawing the nunchaku is just not very bright! But some will suggest this was necessary because they were being used by gang members.

What!?! Are you going to tell me that gang members are trading in their zip guns, 9 mms, switch blades, shotguns and machine guns for a pair of sticks on a string?  What kind of morons do we have in our legislatures?  Well, guess I shouldn't ask a question we already know the answer to.

In addition to giving up fire power, the other problem with gang members using nunchaku is that they would have to learn how to use them - besides, they are not going to pay attention to laws anyway. Why not just give all gang members a pair of nunchaku and several problems will resolve themselves. I remember when I was in college hearing about some guy in California (where else?) who held up a bank with a pair of nunchaku. Just before grabbing the cash and leaving the bank, he decided to give the tellers a demo. As he swung the chuks around - bam - he apprehended himself with a stick between the eyes.

Using nunchaku is not easy and requires considerable training and self-induced bruising. When nunchaku were developed on Okinawa, it was because there was a lack of all kinds of weapons because King Shoshin had banned all bladed weapons on Okinawa in 1480 AD.  So, the Okinawan peasants went looking for other weapons - the nunchaku, and other things like a 6-foot pole, a boat oar, a common hoe, etc. So when is Massachusetts going to wake up and ban hammers, hoes, pencils and car keys? And what about shoes? Remember President Bush having to duck a shoe? Don't tell Lowell's Barney Fife about that incident otherwise the town people will have to run around in bare feet.
Any politician who came up with (or supported) legislation to outlaw fries and nunchaku should be presented with a pair of chuks for punishment and be told to go outside and play. Unfortunately, Massachusetts is not the only state with not so bright legislators. Other states followed in their footsteps including California, New York and - can you believe it?  Arizona. What gives Arizona?

After I moved to Arizona from Wyoming, I stopped by the Gilbert Police Department to find out what martial arts were illegal in Arizona. I was told nunchaku (nunchakujutsu), or anything that acts, looks and swings like a nunchaku is illegal. Imagine that - the legislature banning an entire martial art. According to the Gilbert Police Department, it is also illegal to have foam rubber nunchaku (after all, they are just as dangerous as french fries). And if you purchased those simple plastic nunchaku found in a ninja toy sets sold at many toy stores for Christmas, your five year old Johnny is risking being wisked away in a Phoenix squad car for having his toy ninja set (this may sound crazy, but based on the state law as it reads according to the Gilbert Police - if it looks and swings like a nunchaku, it is illegal).

Yes, in Arizona, a person can carry a live blade samurai sword (katana) on the streets, a 9 mm strapped to your side, an AK47, but you better not be seen with foam rubber nunchuks or you will be on your way to jail. Come on Arizona - where's the logic?

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